Indiana Banana

I had the best dream last night!

I was sitting in the train eating a banana (Oh boy! You can already tell this is going to be a great dream!), going home from uni, when I reached my stop.
So I got off the train and was walking towards the staircase on the end of the platform leading to the station hall.

However, just before I descended the staircase, I finished my lovely banana and tossed the banana peel carelessly aside (Note: I am not a litterer in real life. This dream does not portray any real facts about my characteristics or any feelings I might have towards my mother, so stuff yourself Freud). Suddenly this rather heavyset woman who had been walking behind me, skidded on the aforementioned banana peel and smacked down violently on the floor.

Now let me clarify.
When I said 'rather heavyset', I meant 'HOLY CRAP! SHE WAS FRIIKIN' HUGE!!!' She was a regular Cruise ship complete with missiles, guns and all! She was so big my first impression was that my dream was occurring at night for the shadow she cast upon us all!!
Now, take this hefty mass and combine it with the velocity of which she skidded and you shall end up with a dangerous momentum which, such that it did, instead of keeping her a stationary heap on the ground, propelled her forward with such thrust that she reached the tip of the platform, and then started rolling down the stairs.

Meanwhile, I was currently halfway down the stairs and had missed out on the physics of all of this.
It was only when a distant rumbling was heard and the ground started shaking beneath my feet did I turn around and look up to see this gargantuan boulder of human flesh rolling towards me screaming like a Valkirye.
I too began screaming and started running for dear life, bounding down the rest of the stairs while the rolling woman slowly gained on me, edging closer and closer, until just in the nick of time I reached the bottom of the staircase and dived to the side leaving it sailing onto the station hall where it knocked down a bunch of cops who, coincidently, were standing in perfect bowling pin formation. STEE-RIKE!

I got up and looked up and noticed there was now a crowd of angry people looking down at me with very hostile expressions and there were all armed with spears and blowdart pipes.
I was off running before their leader screamed: "GET HIM!!!"
I ran for dear life through the hall and out into the bus and tram depot ducking under and jumping over the darts and rocks that were being blown and hurled at me!
By now the 'Raider’s March' theme was in full swing, and I turned the corner to find another mob coming from the other direction and in the process of cutting me off! I was about to despair when, suddenly, I spotted my bus parked at its stop in the open just between the two groups who were rapidly gaining on me, and by Dark Magician it just about ready to leave!!

I put all my energy into gear and sprinted towards it giving it my all as if my rectum was burning The Fire Of Hades Itself and dived into the bus just as it started closing its doors – then reached out and grabbed my hat (yellow baseball cap) which had fallen off me head, just before the doors slammed shut!

Then the bus’s engine gave a mighty roar, and as I stuck my head out of the window and waved my flapping hat in the wind, it triumphantly drove out and past the enraged hordes whom were dancing about in an odd fashion, spouting gibberish while they waved their fists and spears about in the air!

And then I woke up!
Now that was a sah-weet dream!!!




Incidentally, I couldn’t find my pillow in the morning...